TOP FIVE...
AUSTRALIAN FILMS
Starring an up and coming Mel Gibson and Directed by Peter Weir, Gallipoli deals with one of the most important parts of Australian history and is a perfect example of an Anti War war film. The final shot is devastating and unforgettable.
Deals with something close to Aussie’s hearts, and I don’t mean bogans. A little story about a big dream, the dream of owning a piece of suburbia, as well as a house in Bonnie Doon, a driveway full of Holdens and possibly a pulpit. A genre defining classic.
Proof that Mel Gibson has always been dangerous on the highways, although in this case you want him on your side. A film that plays on our love affair with the car and the fear of what might be beyond the borders of our cities.
Introduced us all to Baz Luhrman, whose next project is simply called Australia, showcased Australia’s culture of dagginess and multiculturalism equally and made Ballroom dancing popular again, so we have this movie to blame for Darryl being on TV again.
Made every red blooded young bloke want to don an akubra and ride hell for leather down a mountain. The Victorian high country has never looked better and this took Australian bush epics from cheesy TV movies to full scale, heart swelling spectaculars.
MARTIAL ARTS MOVIES.
In no particular order.
Enter the dragon is probably Bruce’s most well known film but for me I prefer this, his directorial debut. Bruce plays the fish out of water role, transported to
Like Bruce Lee, you can’t talk about martial arts movies without including Jackie Chan. I’ve chosen Drunken Master 2 for its outstanding fight scenes – including drunken boxing – Jackie’s humour and the real punishment he puts himself through in order to create the best movies he can.
This is not one of Li’s better known movies and is possibly hard to get a hold of but it features one of cinemas best martial artists in his prime. Li goes from Shaolin Monk to outcast to Tai Chi master. The story is strong, the fight scenes are fantastic and it features Michelle Yeoh, one of the best Chinese actresses around, later seen in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon and Memoirs of a Geisha.
The only reason to mention the plot of this movie is to say that what little there is gets in the way of the fight sequences. The fights themselves have to be seen to be believed. Tony Jaa is a Mauy Thai monk in training with fists, knees, elbows and head of fury. Forget your fancy wirework, these guys are pulling no punches and it shows, the most full on and unbelievably skilled fights I have ever seen on film. It even features a tuk tuk chase through downtown
A mid twenties actor playing a teenager in a new town, an aging Japanese handyman come Sensei, all American bullies we can despise, a love interest and a catch phrase that swept through the world. ‘Wax on, wax off.’ Pure
CHRISTMAS THEMED MOVIES
Depending on your age you will have seen the original 1947 version or the 1994 remake. Either way it’s the quintessential Christmas movie about believing and about holding onto your beliefs. A cute as pie little girl, a genial old bugger and the system they are fighting, you can’t go wrong.
Charles Dickens’ timeless tale in one of its many many remakes. This is the one I like because it has Bill Murray and Bobcat Goldthwait in it. For another hilarious take on it I would also recommend The Blackadder Christmas special.
After all that saccharine sweetness you need something a little bitter to chase it away. What better that Billy Bob Thornton as a whiskey swilling, foul mouthed redneck Santa who happy to beat kids up. So wrong but so funny.
Introduced us to the first of the Culkin’s, spawned 3 sequels and was possibly single handedly responsible for a rise in roles for smart mouth little brats. But it was funny and clever and we couldn’t wait to see what little Macaulay was going to do to Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern next.
Mclane goes out to the coast for a few laughs over the Christmas holidays and finds himself up to his neck in terrorists - bad news for the terrorists. Alan Rickman gives the bad guys of tomorrow something to aspire to and Willis gets to smirk his way through one liners and action aplenty. Gold.
The road movie takes a physical journey and uses it as a catalyst for a spiritual emotional or moral journey. Disregarding any number of horror movies where the travellers find themselves in a semi deserted locale with strange and hostile residents bent on doing them harm, here are my top 5 in no particular order.
Jack Nicholson, Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper, drugs, motorbikes and the open road. It’s 1969, it’s free love, it’s time to find yourself and expand your conscious. Welcome to the new
Before the Fokkers, before analysing this or that, De Niro was playing it straight for laughs as a bounty hunter dragging mafia accountant Charles Grodin across
The scene: Steve Martin and John Candy, newly acquainted and travelling across the country together, are forced to share a bed in a cheap motel. Inevitably they wake up snuggled together in bed, Candy’s arm draped across Martins chest.
‘Where’s your other hand?’ Martin inquires.
‘Between two pillows,’ replies Candy. Cue a horrified look from Martin, followed by the line, ‘those aren’t pillows!’
Pure gold.
The Griswolds just want to go to Walleyworld, well at least Dad Clark does, and he’s dragging the rest of the family with him. Redneck cousins, getting stuck in the ‘poor black neighbourhood’ and a blond in a convertible will not get in their way. It’s cheesy and the jokes are often lame, but if you’ve ever been on a family vacation, you’ll sympathise.
Max is the ultimate traveller, the wanderer, the nomad. What’s more he is the catalyst for change in those around him. A quintessential Australian road movie (or series of movies), it made real our sense of unease at the vast desert that lies in the heart of our country.
CHICK FLICKS.
Not just one but 5 or 6 separate stories of various relationships in modern day
‘I’ll have what she’s having.’ One of the funniest and most famous lines of the movie, said by the director’s mother. The movie that hypothesised that men and women couldn’t be friends than show two who were for years, then they weren’t then they were again.
Thank God that annoying little kid left his backpack at the top of the
Audrey Tatou is adorable, what can I say? Before she annoyed in The Da Vinci Code, Audrey was Amelie in this quirky romantic fable, set in a Paris that we all want to believe exists, but know doesn’t really. With another actor in the lead it might have been ordinary but Audrey’s sweetness and innocence elevated it to another level.
A movie that should have been in my top five road movies but missed out because I wasn’t thinking straight. Not a relationship movie in the sense of the previous four movies but a different kind of relationship. Two women doing things their own way and paying the consequences. Plus it featured Brad Pitt in his first real role.
DYSTOPIAN FUTURES.
Going to the movies can leave you well and truly depressed. You won’t need shades, because the future ain’t bright. Here is a list of some serious and not so serious dystopian futures.
The book that became the movie that became the template for many lesser stories as well as influencing our language. Big Brother is watching.
A future where we will all be slaves to machines that drain our lives, of course we won’t notice because we are being fed a false reality to keep us happy and compliant. An allegorical tale of modern life mixed with religion, disguised as Sci-Fi.
In the future, you are either genetically modified to perfection or you are a naturally born baby, and therefore a second class citizen. Ethan Hawk is a ‘natural’ playing a dangerous game to climb to the top of the elite ladder.
I’ve seen the future, and apparently we’re all going to be dressed by Gaultier and driving hover cars that look like they were designed in the 1940’s. We will also be under threat of annihilation from a race of deadly aliens – Unless Bruce Willis can tell the fifth element he loves her, and Chris Rock can find fire.
MOVIES FEATURING WRESTING.
In no particular order.
Peter Parker tries out his new found power in an all challengers welcome wrestling match. In doing so he discovers that with great power comes great responsibility.
The movie opens with Connor McLeod, our immortality seeking hero, watching a wrestling match. He then heads down to the underground car park where he proceeds to engage in some combat of his own, liberating a foe from his head.
The professional wrestling documentary that exposed the world of wrestling for what it was. Of particular interest is Mick Foley and the injuries he receives in this ‘fake’ sport, and Jake the Snake, a wrestler who has lost the spotlight but has found drugs. Compelling viewing.
Robin Williams as a Greco Roman Wrestling intellectual, John Lithgow as an enormous transvestite and sex scene that goes terribly wrong.
Replace Michael J Fox with Jason Bateman, Basketball with wrestling and keep everything else pretty much the same. Ok, so it’s not really a good movie at all, but it does have wrestling in it.
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